At work today, two of my colleagues (who we'll name X and Y ) and I engaged in a conversation that went from lively to heated very quickly. It doesn't help that one of them and myself have very strong characters and opinions.
We started talking about a case that happened recently to a 14 year old girl. she became pregnant by a man 10 years her senior. We exchanged opinions about why we thought it was wrong and action that will be brought against this man. One of them mentioned that girls nowadays are simply too mature, and some downright seduce older men, but it was generally agreed that although this may be the case, the adult should have had the sense and responsibility to say no and walk away.
The topic then turned to that if X's teenage daughter ever came home with the news that she was pregnant, he'd knock some sense into her and then take her himself to get an abortion, whether she wants it or not. This is where my fuse blew. Before you think this is a post about pro or anti for either sides, it's not. It's about another person's body and making decisions for that person's body, especially decision that have long-term effects (whichever choice they make)
X argued that since the child is a minor and lives under his roof and his rules, the girl may not get pregnant or carry it to term. This immediately pulled my heart strings because I myself was in a similar situation being a pregnant teen under my parents' roof. It didn't help either that he expressed himself with such anger and obscenity. True, being the parent of a pregnant teen is by no means a walk in the park, but it's not a death sentence either.
The argument ensued, and because of personal experience and opinions ( and a bit of hormones too) I could not reason with an unreasonable person and keep my cool any longer so I got up and left before my anger got the best of me. It got me to thinking though. The first comparison that popped up in my mind was circumcision.
How is forcing your teenage daughter to get an abortion regardless for their feelings etc much like circumcision? For one simple reason. IT'S.NOT.YOUR.BODY.
You think circumcision is o.k.? Please leave now, it's not o.k.
Have you any clue what kind of short and longterm effects circumcision has on a baby? I'm against it for all reasons, and also because it's not his choice. Which baby will ask you to chop off a chunk of his junk? Few men would, and I doubt any little boys would jump at the chance.
Not going in to the pros and cons of abortion the fact remains is that it holds long lasting consequences for the mother carrying the baby. Not just physical, but also psychological and emotional consequences. Imagine that the young mother did in fact want to keep the baby and do her utmost to raise it, how could you look your daughter in the eye with pure anger and outrage and dare lift a finger against her? How could you deny her wishes and forcefully carry her to have such an invasive procedure? I can't seem to comprehend it, and I don't think I want to either. All things aside, It's not your body, and it's not your choice.
For this I would hope I will educate my daughter to make this decision on her own. I do hope she would listen to my opinion about the matter since I was her age once and have 30 years more life than her. I hope I build a relationship with her that my mother failed to build with me and that she will consider the feelings of the father and have a plan if she wants to keep it or not.
ReplyDeleteI think a majority of the people out there on the pro-life or pro-choice debate should realize that its all about choice. The woman's right to chose what is best for her and her body, her situation and how it effects the people around her. I think if more people realize that, we wouldn't have people killing MD's or the Federal Governments having to resort to scare factors to try to close education centers like Planed Parenthood or any place that helps with the education of women. Also the pro lifers should understand that if more and more single women do carry to term and they can not afford the expense of that child they would need to turn to the government programs which have been cut or are getting reduced in funding and then the pro-lifers argue and get upset at there are too many women on the programs and they shouldn't have had sex and had the kids but won't fund the programs that would have prevented this in the first place.
Me and my husband are split with the Circumcision debate for boys. I think if I was to have a boy, I would want to keep him whole due to the fact it requires a little extra cleaning than if it was circumcised. He's circumcised as it wasn't even a decision his mother made (he was born in 1969) it was just done. He states that he would want his son to not feel different when he goes to the locker room and sees other males with different penis'. I know religious practices have been doing this for thousands of years. That is why when and if I have a boy my husband would want the circumcision done by a Chinese Rabbi and I stated that was a good compromise.
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